Self-Inflicted Disability

Yes that is me in July 4, 1994  jumping for joy in the middle of Broadway, Times Square.  

I have now seen 2 months go by and yet to throw my leg over the top tube. I watch the days of Summer come and go, my time to ride-sweat-reflect as I spin down the road.  Simply, I am injured and this will require much patience and "breathing".  I now know what it is to be like in a crazy City that moves quickly around you almost like a whirling vortex.  "YES, I am sorry I have to take one step at a time on the Subway Entrance and Exit!"  "YES, I am sorry I require more time to walk anywhere with my "Chester" like stride."  I need to take it easy New York City and I need to get to work using the Public transportation.  My 'New York minute' is 20 or more depending on the distance and percentage of grade.

It all began with a simple collision with the Subway Turnstile at the 2nd AVE & 72nd Street Station.  I was thinking about work and wrapping my head around riding 100 miles in Texas on a sponsored group ride.  I thought I had swiped my Metro Card to pay the fare, but NOT!!!  BAM! my right thigh took most of the impact.  OWWWWW! that is going to be sore for a while I said.  A week later it was so swollen from hip to knee, my thigh looked like a huge sausage.  It was painful and immediately made my daily routine to a level of REALLY challenged.  Imagine not being able to bend your leg so you can put your pants on or a sock.  Not to mention sitting comfortably, always with a leg straight and elevated.  Getting in and out of the shower was tough, due to the fact that we have a tub.  And I thought recovery from open heart surgery was a challenge--it was but this comparabile with a real photo finish.

I have a hematoma in my right thigh and I take Coumadin for the artificial heart valve.  Imagine if, in the night someone inserted a hard boiled egg in your thigh between muscle layers.  Not to much fun, let me tell ya.  It took almost a month before I could bend my leg to a (guessing) 75 degree angle.  I thought I was on the mend and then it happened.

July 1st brought hope and then July 2nd  immediately back to "square one" with more PAIN and more swelling.  I know pain from the open heart, but this was something new and not fun.  It was very much like my leg was going to explode from the pressure within.  I almost went to the Emergency Room twice, but I did not want to wait for hours in that "meat locker"; very cold in that place.  I gutted it out.  I am now thinking to myself, this is going to take a LONG time to heal so just accept it.

It is now almost the end of July and I am getting better each day with small gains.  I don't think about riding my bike so much as just being able to walk and sit normally.  Then I can stretch and do some jogging-start out slowly, listen to my body.  Eventually I should be back throwing my leg over the top tube spinning away.  I am sure that day will come and I project mid September, but I am not going to rush.

June 7th I embraced the concept of me turning 60 years of age.  Now I need to embrace this new thing----self-inflicted disability.  I have a good understanding the challenges of those who navigate life with impairments and I have a new respect for those individuals.  I also know what it is like to be older and not able to keep up with those younger or more mobile.  I have now joined the "herd of turtles" I refer to when I am with those who move slowly.  My world is not a fast pace right now in New York City.  I might not fit in at this time, but I will catch up with you.  "I will ride within myself", as we say in cycling.  And hopefully soon I will be able to leap for joy in Times Square again.

By the way, I still have that shirt and shorts.  It pays to buy quality things.